This writing is inspired by a book from an American Psychologist, Clark E. Moustakas.
Loneliness is not alone. Many may say alone is by choice. In contrast, loneliness is due to our inaction or inability to connect with other people; however, in my perspective, they are all the same.
The journey starts on the day we were born and ends someday that we don’t know yet.
It is just that, if we are lucky, we are being nurtured by kind fellow human beings. They can be our parents, grandparents, or kind strangers that adopt and take care of us. It is a tough job; imagine we are still struggling to take care of ourselves nowadays. Imagine 20s somethings are busy working, hastily getting food from McDonalds or fast-food chain. We are thinking of how to pay bills, how to make money, how to have a comfortable life. Along with that, we need to raise a little human being, who is completely dependent on us. Who we love unconditionally.
Mr. Moustakas explains loneliness well in his book with the same title [1]. The books tell stories of famous adventurers and poets. It depicts vividly the feeling of solitude, and the realization comes from the experience. There is a quote that I remember:
“As at my birth, she gave me life, so in her death she gave me new life.”
Humans are mortal. That is the truth. Every time I hear that someone has passed away, I grow silent. The event reminds me that time is limited. It makes me start questioning whether I have lived the way I want it to be. Then, I start a new life, a new me.
I may stop here and won’t spoil it anymore. The book is quite pleasant to read. In summary, alone is one of the essential feelings of humans and like any other feelings, it is impermanent. We welcome when it arrives, and we let go when it’s ready.
Lastly, I highly recommend this book to young folks who are learning to be self-sufficient and are alone for the first time when they go to college.
Take care! Trust me you’all won’t be alone forever.
[1] C. E. Moustakas, Loneliness. New York: Prentice-Hall, 1990.
— SP —